If you have some extra cash, and you want to keep it away from tax authorities, your spouse, and your kids, these tips are for you. With a little financial bleach, money laundering is very much possible. Your dirty dollars could remain more or less untraceable. Here is the second part of “Top 5 Money Laundering Tips.”

Tip Number Two: Little Smurfs

Do you remember the little blue men, those cute little smurfs? In business circles, “smurfs” are not cute and innocent. They are key people that help the big guys perform money laundering by making lots of little bank deposits in order to transfer money without detection.

Find Yourself A Little Guy

After making a “blue man” deal by telephone or via email, you’ll then have to carry the money to a smurf’s house. The “little man” will then put small portions of your cash into some account(s) every day for several months or maybe years keeping the numbers low…

Tip Number Three: Go Corporate

You can’t make the real “big deals” without going corporate. If you are a politician or a corporate executive, you can’t receive a bribe without a corporate. The client puts your cash into a shell firm in an offshore zone, where your personal credentials remain anonymous. You then are able to invest or spend the cash. The company writes the money off as an expense.

Tip Number Four: Diamonds

Diamonds are girls’ best friends and IRS’ worst nightmare.

Tartar Control

Let’s say you want to transfer one million into the U.S. without being detected by IRS. You can buy diamonds for cash, then smuggle them abroad in toothpaste containers to fool officials. The gems may later be sold for dollars, to private dealers.

Tip Number Five: Problem Ahead

Crooked launderers should always remember that crime pays, but the price is on the rise. The truth is that the “good” banks are now difficult to find. As a result, some huge big fish are getting caught. One example includes the world’s best soccer player, Lionel Messi. His father and he are accused of laundering five million dollars…

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